15 Fortune Cookies that Will Fortunately Put a Smile on Your Face

funny fortune cookies

One of my favorite parts of ordering Chinese food is that crispy, sugary cookie that cracks opens to a narrow strip of paper. It’s no surprise that we’re often more excited to see our next vague “prophecy” and a few lucky numbers, rather than the actual dessert.  Yes, we’re talking (funny) fortune cookies!

Fortune cookies may not always be an accurate forecast of what your future will look like, but there’s no denying that they bring a little entertainment to the end of a meal. Whether they may be spot-on accurate, hilariously funny, or just plain weird, we’re here for it.

We’ve done some searching, and came up with a list of our favorite funny fortunes hiding inside those magical cookies. These are real IRL cookies, not made from a fortune cookie generator. Some are scary until you realize it’s just someone messing with the fortune cookie receiver.

1. Facts only.

2. What are you trying to say?

3. You are not wrong.

 4. Coincidence??
5. Not going to lie, I’m a little scared.
6. Seriously, should I  be worried?
7. I’m not going home. 
 8. Strategy is key.
 9. My type of fortune.
10. Someone had to say it. 
11. A curious little cookie.
12. Nope.
13. Word to the wise.
Funny fortune cookie
14. So this just happened…
15. Enticing. 
Classic!  There’s a lot to go about with our favorite post meal prophecy.  If you want to make your own at home, go for it! If you are at a restaurant and open a fortune cookie and find something so ridiculous or hilarious, please send it our way!  My brother recently got one that simply said “You are not Superman.”  Haha, Superclassic funny fortune cookies. Aside from funny fortune cookies, there are also regular fortune cookie sayings out there.  Sometimes.  If you get lucky.

-Joe & Olivia