It's a beautiful day in the world of HR! As I sit down to my inbox, the top email is from Miss FIRST NAME FOOD ITEM complaining about FIRST WORLD PROBLEM. I half chuckle/half sigh, then glance at my calendar to see that I have an 8 a.m. call with the ACTIVITY ( i.e. skydiving, sleeping, etc.) committee regarding an on-going issue with NEGATIVE EMOTION (grumpy, whiny, etc.) ANIMAL(PLURAL) followed by an on-going investigation call regarding someone allegedly ACTION (i.e. sneezing, coloring, eating, smashing) the entire office's coffee supply.
Suddenly, my phone starts ringing, it's FIRST NAME in COMPANY DEPARTMENT. I know good and well they just want to vent about the OFFICE EQUIPMENT NAME still making everything COLOR. I've told them multiple times that this is an IT issue, not HR! I quickly put myself on DND and start reading through the business case submitted to promote Mr. SOUND-Bottom to Chief CHORE (i.e. dishwashing, vacuuming, etc) of SILLY LOCATION NAME. It's a decent business case but I'm really doubting that the 15 yrs of ACTION (i.e. honking, tweeting, singing, etc.) the INSTRUMENT counts as applicable experience! Nor does, "because I said so" justify a business need!
What's this? Did SILLY FIRST NAME really just put time on my calendar for 20 minutes from now to discuss how to enter an MSS transaction for an CAR REPAIR change?
Next I go to the Your Voice comments to see what I can address. The first comment to catch my eye says "My work/life balance would greatly improve if we implemented mandatory FUN ACTIVITY (i.e. petting puppies, happy hour, etc.___ ) breaks and added a weekly stipend for shopping at FAVORITE PLACE TO SHOP"
The next one I read mentions "High job satisfaction due to working from home and never having to wear CLOTHING ITEM again!
Whoops! Only 3 minutes until my next call which involves coaching a seasoned manager on their ACTION style. While I'm sure they have the best of intentions, it's never ideal to accidentally email the entire LOCATION office and disclose that you put 37 hours on your timesheet this week to watching STREAMING PLATFORM!
Wow - this day has flown by! The only thing left on my to-do list for today is pulling a report so I can present next week to the ELT on how many employees have ADJECTIVE MAKE & MODEL OF VEHICLE. Lucky for me the report is broken so that'll have to wait!
As I close my laptop, I reflect on how lucky I am to work in HR. There may be days that are crazier than a COLOR, ADJECTIVE, MYTHICAL CREATURE but I wouldn’t have it any other way!
